BRIAN VINER: Keanu Reeves returns as John Wick... but it's no classic

John Wick (Keanu Reeves) is back, on another incontinent and indeed inter-continental killing spree.

It all began, you might recall, when someone killed his puppy in the first film. Wick is a dog-lover, and if you harm his canine best friend, then good luck to you. You might have time to kiss your loved ones goodbye before he blows your head off, but probably not. He is one-third Doris Day, two-thirds Dirty Harry.

Having followed the trail of corpses through the first two films, I sat down to this one determined to keep track of how, as well as how many, Eastern European, North African and Asian heavies Wick sends to the Great Hereafter. Wick has 1,000 ways of killing a man who has crossed him, and 500 ways of killing a man who hasn’t, but simply knows someone who has.

John Wick (Keanu Reeves) is back, on another incontinent and indeed inter-continental killing spree

John Wick (Keanu Reeves) is back, on another incontinent and indeed inter-continental killing spree

Unfortunately, my resolve melted after the very first burst of extreme violence, which takes place in the New York Public Library. There, Wick has an altercation with a thug the size of a wardrobe, eventually battering him to kingdom come with a book of Russian folk tales.

It’s like a deranged version of Cluedo, not that there’s any mystery identifying the killer when Wick is in town. Anyway, that’s when I knew I had to bail out early from any attempt at a body count. When it kicks off with death by textbook, it’s only going to get weirder.

And it does, of course. The third film starts where the second ended, with Wick, the greatest professional assassin of all time, himself in mortal danger of assassination.

His only real friend is a pitbull, although this is not one man and his dog as the late Phil Drabble would have recognised it. Nobly, Wick prioritises the dog’s safety even before his own.

There’s a $14 million bounty on his head and he is running — as well one might — through the rain-lashed streets of Manhattan before the contract goes ‘open’, meaning anyone can terminate him.

Having followed the trail of corpses through the first two films, I sat down to this one determined to keep track of how, as well as how many, Eastern European, North African and Asian heavies Wick sends to the Great Hereafter

Having followed the trail of corpses through the first two films, I sat down to this one determined to keep track of how, as well as how many, Eastern European, North African and Asian heavies Wick sends to the Great Hereafter

Anyone with a death wish of their own, that is. Trying to whack Wick is even more perilous than knocking off his pooch.

Later, in Morocco, a bunch of Arab would-be fundamentalists have a go, but by then Wick has enlisted the

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