Hand-in-hand as confetti rains down, a happy young couple stride out of a church together as husband and wife – and into a future they hope will be filled with enduring love and the joys of parenthood.
But, although you would never guess it from their beaming smiles, by the time Tim and Primrose Isterling posed for this picture at their wedding in May 2017, they already knew their dreams would never come true.
Just three months after they met in 2016, Primrose, then 24, began to suffer excruciating abdominal pains which doctors diagnosed as a grumbling appendix.
Prim, as she was known to family and friends, needed an operation. But she was expected to make a full recovery.
By the time Tim and Primrose Isterling posed for this picture at their wedding in May 2017, they already knew their dreams of parenthood together would not come true
To their horror, surgeons discovered the real cause of her pain was advanced bowel cancer which had already spread to her other major organs. At best, they reckoned, she had two years to live.
Tim, 27, from Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, recalls: ‘Getting the diagnosis was horrendous, but not once did Prim feel sorry for herself. This was why I loved her so much. In the face of the worst possible news, she just radiated positivity.
‘There was never a shadow of a doubt in my mind that we were meant to be together, whether it was for a few weeks, months or an entire lifetime.’
But while Prim’s needs and health were the priority, Tim had to come to terms with the fact that, having only just found the love of his life, he would soon lose her.
It is, undeniably, an agonising situation – and one faced, sadly, by thousands of British couples every year. Yet experts warn that, all too often, the partners of those suffering from a serious illness often neglect their own health – feeling the need to ‘stay strong’ and be supportive.
So just how can a partner cope, in such difficult circumstances, and is there anything that can be done to prepare for the worst?
As soon as Prim was given her diagnosis, the couple sat down and started to make a list of all the things Prim wanted to do.
And then they set about doing it all: going skiing with friends, sailing on the famous Gypsy Moth round-the-world yacht and getting a border collie called Belle, as they knew Prim would never become a mother.
Yet privately, Tim battled an overwhelming sense of loss. ‘It was like I had already started grieving,’ he remembers.
As soon as Prim was given her diagnosis, the couple sat down and started to make a list of all the things Prim wanted to do
This phenomenon – mourning the loss of someone who is terminally ill but still alive – is what psychologists call anticipatory grief. It can persist for months or even years, depending on diagnosis, and can take an exhausting mental and physical toll on those who suffer it.
A recent, small Portuguese study looked at the psychological impact of anticipatory grief among those caring for someone with terminal cancer.
It found more than two-thirds had depression or anxiety and half suffered physical symptoms such as joint or muscle pain, gut problems and loss of libido.
Jessica Mitchell, a
