Ross Gardner says his life would have been different had he never met Peter Beardsley.
He would not be reflecting on a lost career, gambling addiction and a suicide attempt.
The 34-year-old does not blame Beardsley for all of the above and accepts responsibility for his own actions, but he believes he could point to the moment his life changed.
Ross Gardner says his life would have been different had he never met Peter Beardsley
That was in the summer of 2002 when, aged 17, he came under Beardsley’s care at Newcastle United’s academy.
Gardner, a midfielder, had been captain of an England Under-17 team including Wayne Rooney at the European Championship and was already on a professional contract at his boyhood club.
But within 10 months he was sat in front of a Premier League tribunal as he and a team-mate attempted to terminate their contracts having brought bullying claims against Beardsley and academy director Kenny Wharton.
Gardner spoke with Sportsmail about his treatment under Beardsley, and the impact it had
He was snide and vindictive. I lost interest in football
They were unsuccessful. The coaches were cleared and remained and the players later joined Nottingham Forest. That was when Gardner feels his life began to unravel as the negative experience shattered his self confidence and weighed heavily on his mind.
Today, after years of addiction and a period in Tony Adams’ Sporting Chance Clinic, he feels back in control. The news that has Beardsley finally left Newcastle after a bullying and racism investigation has been met with relief.
But during the course of Newcastle’s 14-month probe there has been anger and frustration, just as there was when the club statement confirming Beardsley’s departure failed to address the serious allegations against him.
As a result, the Football Association last night confirmed they are now formally investigating the case against the former England star. Beardsley himself has categorically denied the claims throughout.
Gardner noted the line in Beardsley’s own statement which claimed it had been ‘difficult to maintain his silence’ during the investigation. For 16 years he has kept his own silence.
Now, however, he wants to speak out — and his biggest motivation is making sure no young player goes through what he did, and endures the life he has suffered since.
Gardner was a member of the England Under-17 set-up and was making solid progress
‘When the new allegations broke last year I thought, “I knew this day would come”. I just couldn’t believe it had taken so long,’ Gardner tells Sportsmail, revealing his story for the first time.
‘But I was angry. It was happening again — same club, same man. I hated the thought of another young player going through what I did, to feel as low, as helpless and alone.
‘Players should be in an environment where you can develop and realise your potential. That will never happen as long as Peter Beardsley is a coach.
I thought about suicide but I was lucky, I survived
‘I was the first to say something but I was speaking out against a club legend, it was intimidating, I didn’t have the support of the club. I believe it was swept under the carpet.
‘The wider public dismissed us as bad apples. Him finally leaving feels like a little bit of vindication. It’s just staggering it has taken 16 years. I’ve no doubt many players suffered in that time.’
None of Beardsley’s former team-mates, players or coaching colleagues have come out in support of him since he was suspended last January. There have long been
