Can we find a way to give Jim Irsay a weekly talk show or a weekly press conference of some kind? The Jeff Saturday introductory press conference was vastly more entertaining than the first quarter of "Monday Night Football'' between Baltimore and New Orleans.
The Colts owner denounced analytics while using analytics to prop up his team's success (but only since 2000, gotta make sure you lump all those Peyton Manning years in there!). He said it's hard to win "in this league" immediately before pointing out Michael Jordan missed a lot of shots and lost a lot of games.
Irsay bragged about never failing to hire a winning coach and ripped the media for potentially questioning what Frank Reich did for the Colts all while ignoring the fact he just fired Reich!
I have zero clue if the Colts will be good or bad in their first game with Saturday as their head coach and who knows how these eight games will go. I do know Irsay is dying to land a high pick to grab a new franchise quarterback (Manning straight into Andrew Luck will spoil a man) and would love nothing more than to hire Saturday full time this offseason.
For now he'll just have to settle with pitting his new coach against Josh McDaniels, the only person who can likely compete for Irsay's disdain with Carson Wentz. Cannot possibly wait to see this game -- here's hoping Irsay gives a presser afterwards, win or lose.
All NFL odds are via Caesars Sportsbook
Thursday, 8:20 p.m. ET
Stream: Amazon
Follow: CBS Sports App
Featured Game | Carolina Panthers vs. Atlanta Falcons
Some nasty weather expected in Charlotte for this TNF tilt between two division contenders -- the total's already dipped down to 41.5 and could slip further if wind picks up. P.J. Walker is starting again for Carolina despite being benched at halftime against Cincy last week. He wasn't good but the defense was a bigger problem, letting Joe Mixon run wild. That's potentially bad news for the Panthers with a very run-heavy Falcons offense coming to town. Cordarrelle Patterson looked awesome in his return and is set up for a big spot here. Carolina's run defense should be better without worrying about the pass whatsoever; I think the Panthers find a way to at least keep this game within a field goal as a result.
The pick: Panthers 14, Falcons 10
Props, Best Bets: Under, Cordarrelle Patterson over rush yards 51.5
Sunday, 9:30 a.m. ET
TV: NFL Network | Stream: FuboTV
Featured Game | Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. Seattle Seahawks
How do they send the NFL to Germany and not give them an Oktoberfest game!??! Come on! The energy for this game should be electric, as apparently the Seahawks are huge in Germany and Tom Brady is popular everywhere. The line movement towards the Bucs (Tampa opened -1 and got as high as -3) is concerning, as is Tampa being good at stopping what Seattle wants to most (run). But I'm backing Geno Smith and Pete Carroll as dogs as long as anyone wants to keep giving them points.
The pick: Seahawks 17, Buccaneers 14
Props, Best Bets: Seahawks +3
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: CBS | Stream: Paramount+ (click here)
Featured Game | Miami Dolphins vs. Cleveland Browns
Jacoby Brissett revenge game?!? It's probably a stretch but the Browns might need Brissett to show up in the pass game against a Dolphins defense that's only really been burnt in the rush game twice, versus Lamar Jackson (119 yards) and Justin Fields (178 yards). If Miami can bottle up Nick Chubb here and make Cleveland one dimensional, the Dolphins could roll with Tua Tagovailoa cooking in the pass game and Tyreek Hill threatening to set receiving records.
The Pick: Dolphins 31, Browns 24
Bets: Dolphins over 48.5
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: CBS | Stream: Paramount+ (click here)
Featured Game | Tennessee Titans vs. Denver Broncos
The fairly desperate Broncos are coming off their bye after a massive win over the Jaguars in London. Denver's defense is impressive, but the Broncos have been gashed in the run several times this season and there isn't a worse sighting than Derrick Henry if you're struggling to stop teams getting downhill. Getting Ryan Tannehill back would be a huge bonus, but if he's upgraded before the weekend this line probably climbs past three. If Malik Willis is forced to throw, Tennessee is in trouble. But if they show up with some read option and get Henry cooking, the defense could tee off on Russell Wilson.
The Pick: Titans 17, Broncos 14
Bets: Pass
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: FOX | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | Chicago Bears vs. Detroit Lions
Expect Justin Fields to be QUITE popular in DFS with the struggling Lions defense coming to town and the Bears QB coming off a 178-yard rush game. Detroit's performance against Green Bay feels more like a GB thing, but if it's any kind of sign for Dan Campbell's defense turning the corner, the Lions could surprise here. It's going to be extremely chilly, which makes me nervous about backing Jared Goff but I'm going to do it anyway, with the Bears at the absolute top of the market here. As long as there's no wind, the over could be a pretty solid look here too.
The Pick: Lions 27, Bears 24
Bets: Over 48.5
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: CBS | Stream: Paramount+ (click here)
Featured Game | New York Giants vs. Houston Texans
Speaking of top of the market ... the Giants are 4.5-point favorites! That's a hefty chunk for a team involved in nothing but close games virtually all season, but the Texans are a pretty bad football team. They've only given up less than 100 rushing yards once this season, setting up Saquon Barkley for an explosion spot coming off a bye. The Giants have operated very similarly to the Bills thus far (they are Baby Buffalo) and I'm going to blindly ascribe Brian Daboll the same off-the-bye success we've seen from Sean McDermott in his career.
The Pick: Giants 24, Texans 17
Bets: Giants -4.5
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: FOX | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | Buffalo Bills vs. Minnesota Vikings
Josh Allen's status is obviously key here. I'm of the opinion he doesn't play in this game, based on the flow and timeline of information coming out of Buffalo on the situation. The line moved pretty dramatically -- down from Bills -6 to Bills -3.5 -- but that probably doesn't fully reflect what the spread would be if Allen is out. He's that important. I'm backing the Vikings catching 3.5 but would probably lean towards Buffalo and capable backup Case Keenum (revenge game!!!) if the line was a pick 'em or Bills -1, etc.
The Pick: Vikings 21, Bills 17
Bets: Pass
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: CBS | Stream: Paramount+ (click here)
Featured Game | Kansas City Chiefs vs. Jacksonville Jaguars
We only have one instance of Doug Pederson and Andy Reid squaring off, and it took place when the Chiefs beat the Eagles by a touchdown in 2017. That doesn't really reveal anything about this game, but all of Jacksonville's losses are by a single score. They clearly won't blow out the Chiefs, but Trevor Lawrence and Co. should be able to keep things reasonably close. 9.5 points is just too much for a team that's gotten out to hot starts and still has backdoor potential. I can't wait to regret this when Patrick Mahomes throws for his third first quarter touchdown pass. We could see tons of points here.
The Pick: Chiefs 31, Jaguars 24
Bets: Pass
Sunday, 1 p.m. ET
TV: FOX | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | Pittsburgh Steelers vs. New Orleans Saints
Very stinky game here -- the Steelers are off their bye, dogs at home and Mike Tomlin needs a W. This is a desperate Pittsburgh squad. And, yes, Andy Dalton is now playing at 1 p.m., but he has a horrendous record against the Steelers, going 3-13 (!) in his career with a 59 percent completion rate, 19 touchdowns and 14 interceptions. He averages just 6.1 yards per pass attempt against Tomlin squads.
The Pick: Steelers 13, Saints 10
Bets: Steelers +1.5
Sunday, 4:25 p.m. ET
TV: CBS | Stream: Paramount+ (click here)
Featured Game | Las Vegas Raiders vs. Indianapolis Colts
What is there left to say about the Colts? Jim Irsay has taken hold of the wheel and he's steering this ship ... somewhere. It's completely mystifying how the line won't budge off Raiders -6 despite Jeff Saturday replacing Frank Reich and 30-year-old Parks Frazier being given the keys to design an offense for Sam Ehlinger on the shortest possible week. I guess this is a Jim Irsay revenge game against Josh McDaniels? The Raiders head coach really, really, REALLY can't lose this game, at home, against this team, given the circumstances. Principle play on Las Vegas.
The Pick: Raiders 31, Colts 14
Bets: Raiders -6
Sunday, 4:25 p.m. ET
TV: FOX | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | Los Angeles Rams vs. Arizona Cardinals
The Rams are down and out right now after Tom Brady once again ripped Sean McVay's heart out. Making matters worse, Matthew Stafford is now in concussion protocol, and his status is completely up in the air. I've got to trust McVay against Kliff Kingsbury -- he's 6-1 against his Cardinals counterpart, with the only loss coming in a massive emotional letdown spot last year after (ironically?) McVay and Stafford took down the defending champs in Brady and the Bucs.
The Pick: Rams 17, Cardinals 14
Bets: Rams -1.5
Sunday, 4:25 p.m. ET
TV: FOX | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | Green Bay Packers vs. Dallas Cowboys
Don't you DARE tell me this isn't a Mike McCarthy Revenge Game. The former Packers coach has the Cowboys cooking despite Dak Prescott missing several weeks and now he rolls back into Lambeau Field as a pretty hefty favorite with a chance to completely snuff out Green Bay's season. Aaron Rodgers and Co. couldn't be more down right now after scoring nine points against the Lions in a really ugly loss. The Cowboys defense is going to come out with their hair on fire here for McCarthy and Green Bay just doesn't have the firepower to keep up if the Dallas run game cooks.
The Pick: Cowboys 24, Packers 17
Bets: Pass
Sunday, 8:20 p.m. ET
TV: NBC | Stream: fuboTV (click here)
Featured Game | San Francisco 49ers vs. Los Angeles Chargers
The Chargers are very bad against the run (per usual) and the 49ers have fully integrated Christian McCaffrey after a few games. Kyle Shanahan is oddly bad after the bye, but the Niners averaged over 365 yards per game against Brandon Staley's Rams
